The Letter

We have finally received our "To Whom it May Concern" letter. Wow this has been a long 7 month wait. I can't believe that such a simple piece of paper can take so long. From what I understand after the United States Citizen Immigration Services approves our paperwork they then cable it to the US Embassy in Bangkok. The US Embassy then lets the Thai Red Cross know who then sends us a date to meet with the Thai Consulate. As soon as we get that we then book our flight. This is so amazing that it is here. I know that we could wait another 2 months but I just cant believe that we our this close. Throughout this whole process I have questioned God. My family has gone through so much recently and continues to go through some heart breaking issues. Chris and I's adoption of Emery has been the one bright light. Now that it is finally here it feels surreal. So many things go through my head; will I be a good mother, will Chris and I be able to give Emery everything she needs, will she bond with us. So many unknowns but I am ready for the challenge and as we draw closer to meeting our baby I know that this is exactly what was meant to be.

Updates

We finally have a small update. We have recieved Emery's birth certificate and more detailed information regarding her birth mother. No information on the birth father but apparently Emery's birth mother does not know who he is. Kind of interesting I wonder how we will talk about this with Emery. I am sure we will recieve help along the way. The Thai Coordinator of our adoption agency believes that the "To Whom it May Concern" letter should be here sometime this week. The paperwork that we recieved is usually an indicator that the to whom letter is on its way. I don't know if I find it really weird that we still haven't recieved our letter. Our coordinator assures me that everything is okay and that with this program things can go really slow. She did say that at the earliest we might be able to head over to Thailand late July early August. Please pray that this happens we are so ready.

A little update on my family, my papa ended up passing away. It has been the hardest thing my family has had to go through. My nana is not doing well. She has a lot of responsiblities things that were left undone because nobody thought he was going to die. The day before he went into the hospital he was riding around in his orchard on his four wheeler planting apple trees. My nana is a strong Christian women but this has been a real test of her faith. I don't know what to say our do for her. She is broken. Please pray for my nana, pray that things start to settle down and that she is able to get through the grieving process as best as she can.

Prayer

This message is going to be short but I need to get it out there. My papa (grandpa) had bypass surgery last Thursday. He was a lot sicker than they had thought. He has slowly made improvements but is still in the ICU. He has been taken off of the ventilator and they are trying to wake him up. He is slowly coming to but things are not 100%.

My papa, family, and I are in need of prayer. I know that if you don't ask you will not receive. Please pray that he will heal and come out of this okay. We need all the prayer we can get.

Thank you!

Life

It has been two years since I was diagnosed with endometriosis, and two years since we started the adoption process. It has been an eventful road that God has led Chris and I down but also an amazing one.

As a child, you imagine what your life will look like; who will you marry, what will your children look like, what kind of career will you have. In all honesty, I did not imagine that this would be my life and this would be the journey that God would take Chris and I on. I married the most amazing man, who loves the Lord and loves me. I could not ask for anything more. I became a Special Education teacher, a job that is extremely challenging but I love it.

Because of my great love for all children I have always imagined myself as a mother, and yes I imagined it in the more traditional way (pregnancy). I don't want to pretend that it was easy to find out I would not be able to have children, to give up on a dream of having a child grow inside me, to be with them from the moment of conception but God has taken me on a different route one that I can only assume is and will be just as amazing. I feel privelaged and honored.

I have been thinking so much about life and how important and fragile it is. I know that everything happens for a reason. I am sure this post is a bit random but I have been thinking about life a lot. I recently had a close friend that has been diagnosed with Colon Cancer and then yesterday my grandpa had a massive heart attack, and I continue to wait for my precious little girl to be put my arms. Please don't get me wrong I have wonderful life it just feel like a lot right now. I know that life is a journey I continue to fall back on Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths."

To Whom It May Concern

We continue to wait for our To whom it may concern letter. It is getting harder and harder! The Thai coordinator from our adoption agency (WACAP) has told us 6-7 month until we will here more. At the end of April it will have been 5 months since we recieved our refferal. Is this normal to wait this long? My heart aches to hold Emery and each day it gets harder. Our adoption agency will be visitng Thailand again in May. Hopefully at that time we will get our letter. At this point we are just waiting for the Thai board to meet and issue the letter. I believe they meet every other week, and am assuming they have a stack of files to go through.

Her room is starting to come together. We have really enjoyed decorating it, now we just need our sweet little girl to be in it. We have a few more big items to get; dresser, rocking chair, more decorations to hang, and of course more clothes & toys. It is really weird, I am starting to feel like wow I am going to be a mommy soon. It kind of feel like the night before Christmas when I was a kid. Except I have no idea when Christmas is going to come. In my heart, I feel that God is telling me to hold on it is coming. I pray every day that she will bond with us right away and that motherhood will come easy to me. Its nerve racking becoming a mom for the first time.

I will continue to try and keep the blog updated, although there is not a whole lot to talk about right now! Soon though very soon!